Tips for how to succeed at state testing:
1. Teach all curriculum by the end of March.
2. Teach only subjects that you will be testing. Science, history, art, music? Not on the test. Not important.
3. Give kids special pencils. They're magic.
4. Do lots and lots of review packets. When your kids are sick of hearing the word "packet", start calling them "review bundles" or "practice presents".
5. Spend money on MAP testing t-shirts for all of the teachers. Ignore the budget crisis. Kids don't need books or desks without duct tape.
6. Bribe.
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